Tuesday, October 18, 2011

The World is MINE

I don't remember the context. It is not important. Last week I told my husband that I can't be sure anything exists unless I am looking at it. This applies to objects, contracts, people, buildings, etc. My perception is my reality, but is it yours? I don't know. This is something I have obsessed   over for some time, but have never put any valid effort into proving, because everything changes as soon as you look at it because it is being looked at right? Trippy? I know. I get this mirror inside of a mirror mind thing going periodically. It drives me nuts. It has a very tentative relationship with the whole obsessive thing that also habitates inside of my head. No, I haven't had it checked out. No, I don't plan on discussing it with a professional, there is not room for more in my head.

Yesterday, my husband who is currently working on his PhD and consuming an inhumane amount of articles daily, told me about one he had read yesterday that just came up and sort of proved my theory on a molecular level. Obviously I am a genius at quantum physics but I never knew. Or did my husband just read this article because I thought it, and I fabricated this entire exchange in my head? Who can ever be really sure?

Recently, in my spare time, when I am not working on applying for an honorary degree in physics or at my day job, I have been doing a little tutoring here in Russia. The pay is great, the discussion group I have been leading once a week has provided me with so many laughs/interesting facts, and let's face it, this blog has been lacking in content lately. I picked up one learner once a week, and agreed to tutoring a 3 year old 2 days a week. The problem is, I only actually like doing things in theory. Actually doing things is really time consuming and exhausting. Especially now that it is getting dark at like 6pm.

Immediately after accepting this twice a week tutor job I wanted an out. I mean come on, I don't even like kids.  However, I was referred by a friend, and didn't want to hear it dissapoint. So I agreed. I have spent the entire morning figuring out ways to build an acme black hole so I could crawl through it and not do the job. My physics knowledge may not be as vass as I previously thought, because this task is eluding me. HOWEVER, my power of telekentics? Spot on. I just got a text saying the kid got the flu and tutoring will need to be rescheduled. I now have an entire week to regret my decision! I willed this to happen with my mind, and I will accept no other explanation. 


  1. I have always wondered about colors. Is what I see as blue the same as what you see as blue? Maybe your blue is my green and we just never knew it because you were taught that my green is your blue. Does that make sense? No? Ok, I'll stop trying to explain. It's a really smart theory that also exists only in my head.

  2. No, wait! I want to hear about this 3 year old Russian kid tutoring experience. I just read some (most) of your blog and its hilarious. I actually laughed out loud (not even LOLed) a few times. Particularly for me, because I part Russian (eh.. Ukrainian, sometimes its the same). I'm looking forward to more!

  3. I do some English tutoring here in Germany and seriously if I wasn't as broke as hell I would never do it. I dread it every time. I cannot explain some things about the English language, particularly with my crappy German, to someone who does not speak English. Gah.

    I'm your newest expat follower - found you via Sara in La Petite Village!

  4. Alex,thanks for the encouragement! Ha! I have actually now been doing it for 5 months and really enjoy it (as much as a sane person can enjoy the company of small children). I am going to post some stories soon about my experiences!

  5. PS I am not saying I would do it if money were no object. Obviously I would buy Paul Rudd if money were no object, not be a volunteer tutor.